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Be A Man
Posted at: 2009-10-15 11:26:06
Original ad:
Old/used soccer equipment wanted for my kid. Will drive to pick up anywhere near Malvern. No calls, email only: ************@verizon.net
From Me to ************@verizon.net:

Hello,

I have a bunch of old soccer equipment that would be perfect for your daughter. I have soccer balls, nets, cleats, etc. Let me know specifically what you need and we can talk prices.

Thanks,

Mike

From ************@verizon.net to Me:

Actually the stuff is for my son because I want to get him started in soccer. I'm in need of a practice net, soccer ball and kids size 6 cleats if you have them. Thanks.

From Me to ************@verizon.net:

My mistake, I assumed it was for your daughter because it is soccer. If that is the way you want to raise your son, I have some other items you may want to buy for him. I have a pink twirling baton with silver ribbons, and a cheerleader set consisting of two pom-poms, pink cheerleader bloomers, and a toy megaphone.

I'm charging $100 for the practice net, $20 for the ball, $25 for the baton, and $30 for the cheerleader set. I don't have kids size 6 cleats, but you don't really need cleats for soccer anyway. Your son could probably just use his bunny slippers.

Let me know if you are interested.

Mike

From ************@verizon.net to Me:

Well I'm definitely interested in kicking your fucking ass. One question, asshole: if you think soccer is so gay, why do you have soccer equipment, and a cheerleader set and baton?

From Me to ************@verizon.net:

Please, you aren't kicking anyone's ass. The fact that you are getting your son started in soccer instead of football says a lot about you as a man.

To answer your question, I have the baton and cheerleader set as trophies. When I was a kid, I used to go around the neighborhood and beat up all the other kids who played soccer and steal their stuff. I acquired the cheerleader set and baton from this one kid in the neighborhood, Caleb. I always knew that kid wasn't right - he used to ride around on a pink bike and always wanted to have tea parties with the other kids. I tried to help him by beating him up and stealing his baton, but I don't think it worked. I saw him in Philly a few years ago, blowing some guy in an alley. Anyway, I kept my gatherings in my shed out back as a testament to my manliness, but I need to make room for my new shotgun and power saw.

So do you want the stuff or not? I also have Brokeback Mountain on DVD. I ordered Die Hard, but that was sent to me in error. It sounds like a movie that you and your son would enjoy watching.

From ************@verizon.net to Me:

You must be so proud of what a big man you are with your shotgun and power saw.

From Me to ************@verizon.net:

You're goddamn right I am. It's just part of being a man, which you apparently know nothing about. Tell you what - forget the baton and cheerleader set. I want to help you. I'll sell you my shotgun for $1,700. It is a 10-gauge Remington that'll put some hair on your chest. Take your son hunting with it. There is nothing more manly than blowing a deer's head off and eating the raw venison from its neck.

Then, after you are done manning up, you can come back and I'll sell you some football equipment for your son. I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day.

From ************@verizon.net to Me:

How about you take your shotgun and stick it up your ass and pull the trigger? Go fuck yourself.

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Mike (2015-01-12 23:15:32)
well soccer is less violent than football but both are equally gay, the real manly sport is playing My little Pony strashine of cockblasts all day
Fuckyou (2014-04-21 12:17:50)
Much butthurt such wow
Rekm (2014-02-02 01:24:08)
The way Football players laugh at soccer players, is the same way Rugby players laugh at the NFL.
Rekm35 (2014-02-02 01:21:00)
To all those dim witted Americans on this page... 108 million people watched Super Bowl XLVII while a whopping 749 million people saw the final of the previous Soccer World Cup.
Al (2014-02-01 03:44:01)
Hockey is more manly than football (American or real)??? Do one Ice Skating is for pansies
Batman (2014-01-28 02:26:35)
Soccer is for pansies. You people are so touchy damn.
FT (2014-01-08 20:48:45)
@Soccer=shit's comment. How in the fuck is football harder than soccer? YOU USE YOUR FUCKING FEET TO MOVE THE BALL AROUND. THATS 100x HARDER THEN USING YOUR HAND. Also football pussies have like 10 coats of fucking armors its not the fucking medieval
David (2013-12-28 14:54:22)
Hilarious!!! (ps:if FOOTBALL & HOCKEY are so rough why wear protection there is no protection in RUGBY. Also Ive never seen more broken legs ,arms or any other bone in a sport tan in "FUTBOL"(the original one "soccer" is a stupid name they
dot (2013-11-01 13:21:45)
'You're goddamn right I am.' - That line.. That was all I was hoping for
james (2013-10-03 09:17:53)
this site' jeez people are so easily offended
james (2013-10-03 09:17:10)
Cory, if your familiar with this site how can you be shocked by this entry? besides the fact that it's hilarious, it only follows the standard blueprint of him playing the asshole and trying to elicit a funny response. Thats the whole point of this si
- (2013-09-27 22:34:29)
There's a fine line between being funny and being a cunt, compared to your other pranks this one really doesn't suit you.
Cory (2013-09-03 02:01:56)
Okay, most of these are funny, but this IS fucking stupid, and rude. You should be ashamed about this one. This poor dad. He seems like such a good dad. And what's with the horrific homophobia? Pretty sick man.
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v Hockey is up there in manliness, better than football, same with wrestling. Not WWE, I mean college or Olympic wrestling.
Real man (2013-07-17 12:37:00)
Hockey is much more manly than football, american or normal
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Peter (2013-06-24 18:00:39)
Muricans football should called handegg.
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US-football (2013-05-09 13:16:57)
i used to play soccer. its gay. Now US-football on the other hand is freaking amazing!! they dont have football in other country's so you can't judge it. they have soccer here so we can.
Chris (2013-05-03 14:31:11)
American Football is crap! Its a game for an asshole! So stupid and meaningless! Football, on the other hand, in which Americans call "soccer", is a real sport. Football is a waste of time. I remember watching a full "American Football"
Nz (2013-04-27 23:52:04)
Play rugby you pussies. Try losing the cute protection and play a real mans sport.
Cant stand SOCCER! (2013-04-02 00:11:51)
Soccer Is a horrible sport....I mean who wants to stand around for 3 hours and watch a horrible game with a bunch of homos who cant take a hit. I MEAN THE GAME ENDS WITH A SCORE OF 1-1 WTF! Well I'm gonna go play some "Football" outside.
hi (2013-03-21 16:10:19)
Lol
Football, not soccer (2013-03-11 13:32:07)
American Football is a strategy game for girls and their shitty 'protection', not a sport. Only one real type of football!
Kipo (2013-02-17 10:53:49)
I'm lolling so hard at people who think that The owner of this page really finds soccer gay and go butthurt over it.
soccer is gay (2013-02-10 12:23:41)
It is
TigerladyNZ (2013-02-06 19:32:08)
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LOL (2013-01-24 08:52:23)
@SOCCER = SHIT Rugby is more athletic
SOCCER = SHIT (2013-01-19 12:05:58)
Soccer really is a shitty ass sport, and everyone who says it's better than American football can go shove their soccer ball up their fuckin' ass. American Football is a much more athletically demanding sport than soccer.
alex ross (2012-12-28 17:05:51)
hahahha
boo (2012-12-28 04:35:17)
The funny thing is that he was just trying to piss the guy off,and all these people take it as a personal insult or something.
dick dickenson (2012-12-23 11:59:36)
not even funny who ever made this wasted my time, get a life you fucking loser troll
bill burr (2012-12-23 11:57:51)
football is gay not soccer this is fucking stupid thumbs down!
sammy (2012-12-10 12:27:25)
lol quite funny. but Americans have no clue if they think 'soccer' [sic] is for girls, when the only other options in america are either non contact, or you wear body armour incase you get hurt. Rugby is the man's version of American foot
Gnek (2012-11-14 14:51:53)
I no understand 'soccer'. There is football, and there is handegg.
Spooshl Spoper Odmen (2012-10-21 14:55:20)
Very Funny much! Ha! Ha! Laughter I committed!
Fat T (2012-10-20 04:14:56)
"There is nothing more manly than blowing a deer's head off and eating the raw venison from its neck." Damn it man, I'm crying from laughing here. XD
butthurt fags (2012-10-19 21:33:29)
Are butthurt lol looks like Mike is trolling in the comment section just by posting this lmao. Epic fail kids
Kim (2012-10-07 16:52:45)
You pussies wouldn't last a day doing ballet. Football or Soccer isn't nearly as tough.
suck a fuck (2012-09-23 01:16:19)
All a you gays can shove it up your asses. The most manliest sport in the world is fucken ballet. I can Grand Jetй en Avant that shit without breaking a sweat. Grow a real pair of balls and do ballet you sock suckers.
soccer (2012-09-14 22:53:50)
You people saying that football is better than soccer really don't know anything about soccer... Just think where the word "football" comes from? You morons!!!
11/9, not 9/11 (2012-09-13 12:00:01)
Football (not 'soccer') is the best sport in the world, hands-down. American Football, in comparison, is a pile of monkey shit.
AGuy (2012-09-10 07:34:17)
Soccer is for pussies. The average player is like 5'7" and 160lb. American football players are 10x stronger, faster, and all-around better athletes. Maybe they don't run a marathon playing their sport, but the US has the budget to play a bett
randomasshole (2012-08-06 18:22:31)
No ones gay for liking soccer they're gay for flipping out over a joke,both sports take skill, but the point is he got some idiot really butt-hurt for calling his kid gay and that is funny as hell.
111 (2012-08-05 21:17:17)
fencing is better than any sport
daves (2012-08-02 06:36:08)
i dont know dude... just americans play american football,its hard to undestand that no one gives a fuck about american football, dude everybody in the rest of the world loves real fotball(soccer)but still cool the post very funny
you're all morons (2012-07-30 00:33:53)
american football is about sweaty guys jumping on each other over a ball...does that sound straighter than soccer? americans are so stuck up about themselves and their sports.
Andrew (2012-07-29 23:51:41)
Jesus Christ, check out all the butt-hurt soccer fags on this page. Go enjoy your Commie Ball in silence while we Americans play real sports like basketball and hockey.
Wow really? (2012-07-28 18:23:31)
Who the fuck cares who calls it by what name? It doesn't make either one more superior, and why in the hell would we have two sports named football? That's like thinking I am better than a British person because they call french fries chips.
joe (2012-07-28 09:48:30)
Hahaha look at all the soccer fags
Football sucks (2012-07-25 18:51:37)
American Football sucks, it should be more like handegg then football, atleast ppl here in Greenland are much better, calling FOOTBALL, FOOTBALL, not soccer
e (2012-07-19 19:55:21)
Ever heard of GDP per capita? You may want to acquaint yourself with it. Having a large GDP because you're a country that spans half of a continent isn't exactly a big deal; and even then it's not the largest.
@economist (2012-07-19 11:13:39)
Considering how America has the highest GDP of any country at over 15 trillion. I'd say the economy is fine.
economist (2012-07-19 08:58:36)
well if u think america has the strongest military thats right but what about your economy thats going down the hole cause of it :P
Anon (2012-07-19 08:45:43)
"I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day." LOL
@Sean (2012-07-05 16:13:36)
you dont and you got no brains, you are a country full of people dumb as fuck, so you could have millions of hightech weapons and you would still be too dumb to use them for example the name football is totally wrong you should call it handegg
Lisa (2012-07-05 11:16:25)
@Britter: I'm American, but I agree with you. Soccer and American football are complete pansy sports compared to rugby. You have to tape your ears up for that shit!!! (:
Sean4619642000000000 (2012-07-04 19:52:45)
Soccer dude u are 100 percent correct about football and basketball those sports suck
Sean 374468282919284 (2012-07-04 19:50:20)
Soccer is very fun. Fuck you if u think it's gay
Sean (2012-07-04 19:48:16)
Guy right below me. U are a friggin asshole . America has the strongest military in the world. U callin us pussies. Get the fuck off this sight cunt. You're ass doesnt belong here bitch.
anonymous (2012-06-25 09:37:39)
Americans are pussies. They gotta stop calling all their sports the "world series" as well. Your the only cunts that play it, everyone laughs at how gay u are with all your padding and tights on. FAGS! Play a real mans sport... Like quidditch
Kyle (2012-06-21 22:44:09)
"if you think soccer is so gay, why do you have soccer equipment, and a cheerleader set and baton?" Well played.
Simeon (2012-06-15 10:12:24)
I am a soccer(football over here in Europe) fan, but laughed my ass off :-D I don't mind americans thinking soccer is a pointless game - I feel the same way about their "football" and it's surprising that those boring NFL finals get so mu
The Gayest Baby (2012-06-15 00:14:22)
Look at all these dumb pussies crying and whining over their precious soccer. Nothing needs to be said about soccer. Their tears say more than enough as it is.
football (2012-06-13 06:39:59)
ha ha ....the so called american footbal(eggball is more apt) is played with more protective gear than a iraqi soldier!!,u man up idiota americano
anonymous (2012-05-29 22:59:33)
soccer is gay. american football, basketball, baseball, hockey, and boxing take real skill
hildegain (2012-05-26 14:20:41)
@NFLSOGAY That was actually one of the more intelligent posts I've seen in a while. People should be referring to American Football by its actual name, Gridiron Football.
Lol (2012-05-24 15:52:45)
'I don't have kids size 6 cleats, but you don't really need cleats for soccer anyway. Your son could probably just use his bunny slippers." ..LOST IT
soccer swag(fag) (2012-05-17 15:11:16)
I play hockey and totally agree with you that all those pussy soccer players suck at all sports so they play soccer and it isnt even a sport its organized jogging
Britter (2012-05-15 19:20:11)
American Football is pretty damn gay if you ask me. Real men play rugby.
prahran (2012-05-07 10:59:16)
you are the funniest motherfucker around, who gives a shit about soccer football or any other sport, this site is fucking hilarious if im having a bad day i jump online and read this stuff and it makes my day keep up the good work you crazy fucker....
Bob (2012-05-06 18:56:30)
I hate soccer, but I don't think its gay. It's more like a free for all murder ring than a sport.
NFLSOGAY (2012-04-28 18:05:02)
Very funny LOL but fuck you if you really think soccer is gay. Actually it's called football, only here in the US it's known as "soccer." How is American Football so manly when it's a bunch of guys in tights man handling each other.
Fan (2012-04-27 12:31:55)
Lol, so touchy ... ouch ;-)
paulbeartil (2012-04-13 07:43:26)
hello they will give you there correct sizes if you tell them the height bearty
craigdattons (2012-04-06 21:26:08)
hi is this the type your after please email me craig
TheRussian (2012-03-29 16:09:03)
if rugby is so much better than soccer, then why are people so defensive of it?
TheRussian (2012-03-29 16:05:24)
if you think soccer is gay, you should see the netherlands team play, they can tear apart anyone with one hand tied behind their back
soccer dude (2012-03-28 20:19:07)
*whatsoever
soccer dude (2012-03-28 20:18:38)
i love how every body here is hating on soccer for being a "pussy" sport when baseball doesn't involve any contact whatever and football is for fat-asses that like touching each other. the US's view of soccer is a misconception based on ig
Jay (2012-03-17 23:00:41)
Best quotes: "you must be so proud of what a big man you are." you're gad damn right I am. And "There is nothing more manly than blowing a deer's head off and eating the raw venison from its neck."
LMAO (2012-03-15 20:51:21)
Man I have been reading through these for at least 4 straight hours now holy fuck they don't get old MAke some more man or I will feel lost when I'm all done
Jeff (2012-03-13 00:04:30)
By the way, American football was originally played without all of the padding, and punching, kicking, and eye-gouging were legal. A player being killed on field was not uncommon. That was when men were men, my friends.
Weenie (2012-01-31 00:57:55)
I don't care who likes what sport. That was just down right funny!
Aussie13 (2011-12-21 09:35:49)
I love mike (no homo) he is a master of dark satire :)
Kurt Ketamean (2011-12-18 02:26:07)
Funny shit. I don't like or dislike soccer all I know is there is better sports (rugby) and most pro soccer players prob fuck up anyone dissing soccer here... ouch
Lan (2011-12-15 15:19:06)
My boyfriend is European and a HUGE soccer fan. He laughed so hard at this, he cried. Loosen up people!
Soccer.... (2011-12-05 21:04:30)
Finally a post about how fucking gay soccer is. Up vote!!!
arnold (2011-11-27 17:46:47)
yea, soccer is pretty gay though.
rick ross (2011-11-19 13:59:39)
boxing is for idiots who don't want to be able to speak after they retire
Rob (2011-11-18 22:31:01)
Soccer is definitely gay. It's a pussy sport...but so is football. In fact any sport you "play" is for pussies...ie basketball, baseball and football. Boxing is different, you don't play boxing...you just survive.
Wow (2011-11-14 17:36:31)
Idiots, he didn't mean it as an insult to soccer. People get upset over sports very quickly (OBVIOUSLY...) and he was taking advantage of that. Go put on your big kid pants and grow the hell up.
boner school (2011-11-11 17:58:37)
yea man
Mr (2011-11-09 02:43:50)
Why cant people just be ignorant amd embrace stereotypes
Collin (2011-11-06 11:35:34)
Idiots... How is soccer "gay" give a reasonable answer.
B (2011-10-27 07:53:34)
American Football is basically just European Rugby, only the AF players wear armour and don't seem to move alot.
Johnny Eyeball (2011-10-19 10:42:52)
"Soccer" is not football. European football is basically rugby for pussies. Dives and red cards? Fuck that, you fucking faggots. Play a man's sport. American football is fucking awesome.
MendoSucks (2011-10-17 13:18:14)
@ Mendo (2011-03-28 13:25:35) YOu know that Soccer, aka the gay football, not manball is the world's most homosexual sport?
RazorsEdge (2011-10-17 13:15:08)
Soccer is fagball. The American football is football.
Delfunc (2011-10-15 19:06:23)
Soccer is gay because its all about guys trying to have sex with other guys.
thirdwheel (2011-09-28 23:12:07)
So.... which does he want you to do? Put the shotgun up your ass and pull the trigger or fuck yourself?
anonymous (2011-09-27 18:06:25)
LOL. Soccer is nothing but a bunch a faggotry. Ever see how those fairies are always taking a dive when they don't even get hit? They are just so used to going down they can't help it.
fred (2011-09-23 09:32:07)
Soccer is a game of skill, endurance, strategy, and fitness. Football is a game for inbred idiots who like to have something to watch while they continue to get overweight. Run around in your football tights, touching and patting other men's asses...
fabio (2011-09-16 22:14:28)
that story about caleb was hilarious
@Sad (2011-08-25 23:30:48)
I wish this website had a thumbs up for comments, I would thumbs up you comments so fucking hard.
SadContinued (2011-08-20 03:38:38)
Maybe in your country, there is no such thing as humor/comedy, but in North America, we do this thing called laughing at things that we find funny. If you can't laugh at something, why even bother having the internet?
Sad (2011-08-20 03:37:37)
It's sad that some of you take what's clearly a joke, so seriously. Stop taking things so personal. This has nothing to do with someone like soccer/football, and everything to do with making people laugh.
Who do you think? (2011-07-22 13:34:06)
I lost it at the "and eating the raw venison from its neck" part xD
anonymous (2011-07-19 08:22:02)
It's just a character. Hilarious, nonetheless Some incredibly sad, ignorant and painfully dumb comments though
logic x2 (2011-07-19 08:20:36)
many of the emails. A big part of the comedy is in the fact that people actually believe he is serious. It's similar to Da Ali G show (Borat for all the n00bs), you don't think sasha baron cohen really hates jews like he says as Borat, do you?
Logic (2011-07-19 08:19:20)
Have any of you idiots agreeing with what he says ever heard of "satire"?? You really think that he would want to beat up someone who plays soccer or ride a pink bike? He is portraying an over-opinionated and ignorant macho ass, as he does in m
Jeremy Clarkson (2011-07-18 09:41:32)
Hah, I have no idea what soccer is. Anyway, another cool and manly sport would be football. You know, that game you play with your feet.
fags (2011-07-18 04:06:43)
soccer is for fags!
meh (2011-07-17 23:27:24)
"Please, you aren't kicking anyone's ass. The fact that you are getting your son started in soccer instead of football says a lot about you as a man." Someone just found the universal wrong button to push. X-D
Indeed, sir (2011-07-15 07:02:04)
I'd love to share this but family might not approve ;3 Win troll is win. Trolling is a art, sir :)
actually (2011-07-13 23:46:36)
the term football originated is England. Ah, research and knowledge :) and football and soccer alike are great sports! they both require incredible amounts of endurance, skill and execution!!
Real Men (2011-07-10 10:10:15)
Real men play rugby, without protective gear, like you american pussies.
anonymous (2011-07-01 20:00:24)
Fucking brilliant! You sir, are a true artist.
nexusdouche (2011-06-29 23:38:13)
To be honest, i used to own a pink bike. It's all my mom could afford to get me. The other kids picked on me when I came to school on. I guess ive got some pent up aggresion and confusing emotional problems.
Steve (2011-06-28 09:57:08)
winge winge winge its called football not soccer:( - i really thought gays were well known for being anal and picky
@bahahaha (2011-06-23 06:04:13)
It's called football, dumbass. Only those Gaymericans call it soccer.
Football (2011-06-18 05:48:33)
All you rugby guys need to understand one thing.... Rugby is not manlier than football because you will hold up without pads... but with pads everyone goes all out trying to kill the opposite team.
freekoolin (2011-06-10 10:01:37)
Just cause some hairy gorillas don't feel comfortable enough with their sexual orientation to wear shorts f'em. The beautiful game is all about scoring betties and maybe a goal here and there. Either order is acceptable...bottom line soccer player
Wolf (2011-06-08 08:56:07)
American fuckball is gay, because it is all about touching other men. FUUUUUUUUUUU!!!
Coz (2011-06-03 18:32:12)
Should be top ranked imo
LMAO (2011-05-28 07:28:32)
I loved playing soccer when I was a kid...and this shit is still funny as fuck...you guys needs to relax lmao
Brit (2011-05-27 17:28:35)
I like it, except that Browning is more manly than Remington, as Remington had a long period of time when it made sewing machines...
anonymous (2011-05-26 19:25:44)
. "I'll sell you my shotgun for $1,700. It is a 10-gauge Remington that'll put some hair on your chest" real funny XD
DetSatanClub (2011-05-25 14:10:41)
Lmfao i got nothing against soccer, but anyone who drives around on a pink faggot bicycle is either gay or a gay faggot and deserves to get their ass kicked.
bahahaha (2011-05-25 13:54:40)
He trolled all you soccer-loving douchebags too! lmfao
no imp (2011-05-24 02:45:27)
contradictive, haha "y u think soccer is gay if you have soccer equipment" delightfull
nexusdouche (2011-05-24 01:39:27)
Hey queer-bait, don't use my name and try to turn what i say around.
nexusdouche (2011-05-21 07:38:47)
Okay, okay, I'm wrong. I'm an idiot. I'm a bigoted jerk just like some of the other fuckwicks on this thread.
anonymous (2011-05-21 05:13:42)
"I ordered Die Hard, but that was sent to me in error. It sounds like a movie that you and your son would enjoy watching." LMAO XD
MCDikfore (2011-05-16 14:10:05)
No meg, I'm afraid nexusdouche is right... pink bicycles are for faggots.
John Madden (2011-05-15 03:56:04)
FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT BAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Meg (2011-05-13 23:01:07)
nexusdouche: don't be an ignorant ass.
Meg (2011-05-13 23:00:28)
nexusdouche: don't be an ignorant ass.
nexusdouche (2011-05-13 14:31:36)
soccer isn't gay, but anyone who rides around on a pink bike deserves to get their ass kicked
common sense (2011-05-09 14:39:45)
if soccer is gay, then what's basketball??? wrestling? come on, in soccer you don't really touch anyone, maybe push someone, punch someone in his ugly face or kick him in the balls, as if it's an accident.
Lmao (2011-05-07 19:19:37)
European Whateverball is retarded and fucking gay. There is no 'fotbal', only real football, not faggy men running around faking injuries.
padsR4women (2011-05-03 01:41:24)
this was funny, but there is nothing gayer than fag dudes grabbin each other playin soccer
football... (2011-04-27 07:44:28)
@Chile Verde lol u say american football is the man's sport and rugby is gay? try playing AF without pads... u do the math... if something is gay its soccer like my man Mike say :D fucking hilarious!
fraroc (2011-04-17 18:44:12)
"How about you take your shotgun and stick it up your ass and pull the trigger? Go fuck yourself." That had Me and by buddy on the floor laughing :)
anoynymous (2011-04-13 11:45:38)
The most funny stuff "I saw him in Philly a few years ago, blowing some guy in an alley." Wish i had known Mike when i was living in Philly. It would have been fun to have some chat in personal. You are fucking awesome man.
will (2011-04-10 04:59:45)
This one was't that funny.
Jon Cake (2011-04-07 19:59:48)
Guys! I like hockey. Cue bitching!
really? (2011-04-04 19:29:15)
@Chile Verde do you realize how stupid you sound saying that? I love American football, don't get me wrong, but rugby is FAR from being the "faggot version of football," the way you so kindly put it. its a rough hard hitting sport with NO pad
Chile Verde (2011-03-30 15:13:04)
Actually... American Football was invented in 1823 IN AMERICA... and it was (and still is) called football... Rugby is the faggot version of football: crotch grabbing, scrum caps, diving, etc... over there its just pussy and tampons... SOCCER its an amer
Fagball (2011-03-30 02:03:29)
Ps, "soccer"was first called, football because the players foot is always stroking the balls of another player. in American "football" the foot is used with great force to transport the ball, or be
Fagball (2011-03-30 01:58:29)
Lmao, I love how all the Americans are going on about how gay britain is with they soccer, when in actual fact Britain do pretty much play ur version of "football", except we just fuck each other in the ass and stroke balls with our feet
RoXas (2011-03-29 23:55:13)
Actually Mendos, football was renamed to soccer when a manlier sport came around. Nothing more manly then tackling another man to the ground and breaking his spine.
Mendo (2011-03-28 13:26:33)
cont. player fuck each other in the ass constantly. Britfag ball thats what its called.
Mendo (2011-03-28 13:25:35)
Hes right soccer is shit. Fortunetly Football is amazing. AMERICAN Football that is. Soccer is the name i use to describe that pathetic sport you brits call Football [ya know it right? its the one where you use your VAGINAS to make dives and the pla
catfish (2011-03-25 07:40:46)
im almost positive this man is actually caleb
Derek is GAY (2011-03-25 05:59:03)
@DEREK why would you hurt so much about his JOKES? Maybe ur too insecure and gay. lol
Charles (2011-03-25 00:20:48)
Lacrosse is a real mans sport! I know the guy was being an ass about everything, but if you went hunting with a shotgun, the shot would ruin 75% of the meat. (depending on the size of the animal) When I go hunting I prefer a lever action rifle, but some u
Anonymous (2011-03-23 12:00:30)
soccor IS gay. so is football. croquet is a REAL man's sport.
Mustafi (2011-03-23 01:38:53)
Buy the book, assholes.
Derek (2011-03-22 23:30:18)
Soccer is gay? Don't let anyone in Latin America or Western Europe hear you say that man, they will break down crying in seconds. This one was only vaguely funny as the premise (soccer = gay) was weak to begin with. Mike was the one getting owned
Mohammed (2011-03-22 15:59:47)
LOL Mike even trolled the comment section with his letter xD
:D (2011-03-22 15:03:37)
football (the real kind where you dont run around faking injuries like a pussy) is great and worlds nr1 sport! Balls to you, europeans!)
good cunt (2011-03-20 00:35:09)
pitty gridiron and soccer are as gay as each other rugby league now thats the sport of kings
karma (2011-03-07 23:04:34)
I'm not a fan of this email only because he was undeserving.
lul (2011-02-23 02:20:45)
"Soccer" is the best place to find stunt doubles, they already know how to dive.
,,, (2011-02-21 00:13:22)
Football, not the shitty european kind is awesome.
facebookfan (2011-02-20 15:15:05)
i was drinking while reading this and started choking with laughter XD
NADS (2011-02-16 16:52:38)
I think anyone who has played sports in the past would have respect for both forms of football.
@tbo (2011-02-15 16:18:36)
you sound fat
isabela (2011-02-11 03:19:00)
Was looking this morning for thoughts on God’s use of ordinary people. I appreciated yours.
lol (2011-02-04 00:29:00)
how did this turn into a big arguement about sports?
YEAH BUDDY (2011-02-03 18:04:00)
Id rather get hit by ray lewis with pads on than without pads. each sport has its unique qualities that make it different. Thats why there are DIFFERENT sports. stop being so biased. fighting on the internet is like the special olympics. Even if you win,
tbo (2011-01-28 11:16:14)
rugby, now that's a sport where they don't need padding and it's twice as hard as football, anyway all of those sports somehow require men slapping each other on the ass and sharing showers so none of it's really my game
Alf is Real (2011-01-27 08:28:48)
@Artu Give it a rest, Everybody knows what soccer is even you. you should'nt even be calling soccer football. Football is a real mans game and soccer is played in Europe and South America. Enough said about that...Hey isn't it time for you start a
Deleted (2011-01-18 22:37:00)
This comment has been deleted.
Arttu (2011-01-13 15:15:49)
Ahh, the good old football sport, nothing like the sport of kings. Simple, easy rules, fun and played worlwide..too bad that the american football is not considered in that area. I don't know what you guys mean with "soccer" i only play: footb
@lawlz (2011-01-11 15:12:32)
You are a dick. I tried googling for underwater hello kitty basket weaving and you know what, there's no such thing! Thanks for ruining my day douchbag!
Reclaimer77 (2011-01-11 10:31:31)
I know we're all just trolling here, but the protective padding and gear in football isn't just for protection. It also allows you to deliver harder hits to the other guy than would be possible otherwise. It allows for punishing blows while stil
empty_page (2011-01-10 13:28:07)
What would you tell somebody that is really pissing you out?? Go fuck yourself, wouldnґt you?
Joseph (2011-01-10 05:05:15)
To all of you who like football, how many people have died playing football? None? Right! How about rugby? More than you thought? Correct! That's a manly sport!
lawlz (2011-01-09 17:32:53)
ur all pussies. want a real sport? try underwater hello kitty basket weaving
Chamillah (2011-01-09 13:22:14)
He made me laugh! This dude is crazy/funny!!
cheese dreamer. (2011-01-07 08:14:06)
armor. damned text number limit.
i dream about cheese (2011-01-07 08:09:17)
first off, i hate american football, BUT your comments about them being pussies because they wear pads is bad "logic". why did the spartan carry a shield? was a spartan a puss if he carried a shield? how about today's soldiers? they wear ar
Mr. Tells-You-Stuff! (2011-01-03 04:17:10)
Look, American Football is for Faggots you cant run straight ....They all put on these big plastic "Protectors" Because they don't want to get hurt, *PFFT* Manly? Olololololol. PS: To all the american football players MAN UP GIRLS!:D
George (2011-01-02 23:23:55)
Even though I am american I hate american football. To me it is nothing more than a bunch of guys bumping into each other.
illuz (2011-01-02 14:02:26)
I don't understand why people think sports need to be tough? If that is how it is then basketball and baseball are for pussies only. American football is so fucking boring..
Gleen sanders (2011-01-02 13:34:06)
Rugby isn't like foot ball ass whipe..-.- It's completely different, in foot ball people are hit head on, in rugby people are hugging all the fucking time. Get your shit straight first dumb-fuck XD
jonnynoi (2010-12-16 15:40:10)
As a soccer player I find this troll hilarious. The comment that football players wear tons of padding and soccer players dont is pointless. the sport requires pads. soccer players wear shinguards cuz thats the most likely spot where they'd get hit ha
Optimus Grime (2010-12-16 03:11:24)
Football is a very big bitch sport in America. Rugby on the other hand is a real mans sport. The only reason that football players use pads is because they can't take hits worth shit.
French M (2010-12-08 21:04:19)
One of the best
EGJ5426 (2010-12-06 02:22:44)
LoL wow!!! xD Soccer and Football are my favorite sports.
Noneya (2010-11-30 11:12:08)
OMG this shit is sooooo fucking funny!! What's even more hilarious is seeing a bunch of grown (I use the term loosely and am assuming here)ass men fighting or crying about the E-mails!! ROFLMFAO!!
horselegs (2010-11-23 16:42:59)
The only non-gay sport is Fabergй egg collecting. The rest of you are enormous buttfuckers that can't deal with your homosexuality and make up for it with sweaty ball handling and grab-assery.
barakuda (2010-11-18 13:27:22)
Actually football is what that guy want to teach hes son. I think Mike is talking about handegg.
Rofl (2010-11-03 13:16:43)
People trolling over the prank emails Mike makes and taking these joke emails seriously, just adds to my amusement.
fromengland (2010-10-29 21:45:23)
i love this website, iv never laughed so much at internet shit. also Soccer is indeed for pussies, have you seen wayne roonie? rugby is where its at- american football with out all the pussy padding
Normy (2010-10-26 14:06:11)
Soccer = awesome Football = gay, can't wait for you to switch these up.
Normy (2010-10-26 01:31:28)
Soccer is for guys too...homosexuals. But also Rugby is far less manly than football because Europeans play it and Europeans are generally big pussies
Normyy (2010-10-25 13:17:59)
I'm a pussy
Normy (2010-10-25 02:11:04)
@silly non-americans The "faking of injuries" that you are referring to is 99% of the time only because the player is a giant overly dramatic vagina. NFL players are real men that only go down when they are really hurt
>>>>><<<<<< (2010-10-24 00:16:51)
Hmmmmm...whether you play soccer or football a bullet in your temple will still kill you.
Mason (2010-10-22 07:16:53)
@Robert the fact that you think that American Football is a manly sport says a lot about you as a man. AF players are the biggest pussies in the world. Name another sport were the players wear layers of padding.
lmao (2010-10-21 23:18:04)
I'm seeing a trend...just about all of his e-mails end with "go fuck yourself"
Robert (2010-10-18 01:48:38)
@Mason. The fact that you think soccer is a manly sport says alot about you as a man.
Happy African (2010-10-13 08:00:27)
Notice how the respondents always use 'Go fuck yourself' as a fall-back? LOL.
silly non-americans (2010-10-12 01:55:03)
soccer(futbol) is definitely a pussy sport. In what other sport do you see professional players faking injuries when they get TOUCHED. American football players wear pads because otherwise you would DIE. There are far more injuries and more serious ones i
funny stuff (2010-10-11 01:59:31)
"Please, you aren't kicking anyone's ass. The fact that you are getting your son started in soccer instead of football says a lot about you as a man. " LOL
SR20 MAN!! (2010-10-10 19:33:39)
soccer is not for pussies!! But i find this email funny as shit!! HAHAHAA LOL!!
Rufus (2010-10-09 14:36:47)
Soccer is a term that originated in England you moron, not by fat americans.
David (2010-10-08 12:18:47)
Why are all the comments just repeating what's already been said. Damn we can already fucking read.
RL (2010-10-06 12:18:51)
I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day. LOL
Mason (2010-10-06 01:56:43)
The trolling was hilarious, but I laugh at the comments that say soccer is for pussies. Football players have layers of padding on, soccer players don't. Plus how many fat soccer players do you see, that's right none, there are plenty of NFL playe
anonymous (2010-09-30 09:20:21)
Its a joke dumb ass! relax and laugh!
HandEGG (2010-09-25 21:02:45)
People that call football soccer should be shot, no joke. Fat Americans are just plain stupid ;D
Judge Judy (2010-09-25 00:07:02)
there all jokes you idiot stop taking verything he says seriously
Soccerwatcher (2010-09-22 18:15:47)
Yeah. Soccerplayers get laid, bigtime.
Ross (2010-09-21 15:46:52)
@Mike Football hooligans are vicious. Tell them that soccer is for pussies. It seems like you can't do anything in pro football without there being a penalty.
uhh (2010-09-18 18:20:00)
You are all fags, soccer is a good sport. Wanna play a gay sport? try golf or tennis. or swimming.
John Kimble (2010-09-15 00:25:56)
Way to be trolled by "story" of a guy getting trolled. "omg sockur iz nut gay" go suck some dicks. also "wow, 8 died...... " he said 18 you goddamned moron, learn to read.
Mike Ditka (2010-09-12 11:30:29)
It's true, soccer is for pussies. The comment "the whole world plays it" doesn't really apply. It's popular around the world because the rest of the world are pussies. That's why in 200+ years, the best anyone could muster against
=D (2010-09-11 23:50:24)
"I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day." i just LOL so much that i woke up my mom, pretty good man
anonymous (2010-09-04 11:11:06)
americans are stupid, canada ftw!!
chargrill (2010-08-25 20:47:22)
America - England baseball - rounders (girls sport) basketball - netball (girls sport) Football - Rugby (guys sport but we don't wear armour) ... America fails at manly sports that being said this stuff is hilarious ^^
broski (2010-08-25 16:48:24)
...that laid that hit
broski (2010-08-25 16:47:43)
american here, and huge football fan i played on my college rugby team last year and saw a man get hit so hard it put him in a coma and he died a few weeks later. I've never seen that shit happen in american football. then again, it was an american t
mee (2010-08-21 08:43:50)
wow, 8 died...... thats tough. I still don't understand why you need pads to protect from skinned knees and shit.
John (2010-08-19 03:37:56)
—three in college play—and 159 serious injuries. When is the last time that happened in your pussy ass rugby?
John (2010-08-19 03:36:49)
American Football hits harder and has more injuries than your pussy sport rugby. And BTW the plural of pussy is pussies. The reason American footballers wear equipment is that in October and November 1905, football at all levels had eighteen fatalities—
boba d bob (2010-08-14 05:28:00)
american FOOTBALL is for pussy's (with that many breaks and grear) try NRL for real men we have two breaks and thats for half time, and no gear.
Caleb (2010-08-12 10:30:06)
YOU FUCKIN TURD! GIVE ME MY FUCKING BATONS NOW OR ILL CALL THE COPS! I GUESS YOU ALSO FORGET TO MENTION YOU MADE OUT WITH ME!!!!!! MY NUMBER IS *******
Dan (2010-08-09 18:41:23)
This was the first one that I have to say wasn't funny (excluding the Caleb part). Good stuff though, keep it up.
Soccer sucks (2010-08-09 10:01:02)
Be a man
synonym (2010-08-09 08:03:49)
wops, american FOOTBALL ;)
synonym (2010-08-09 08:02:09)
lol! This was fantastic! but, soccer isn't a girly sport. at least they don't use all that pillowing as in american soccer (the wimp version of rugby)
Justin Bieber @ Wake (2010-08-07 21:51:36)
Man soccer is for pussies. Gotta be a wimp if you break or hurt anything in soccer. Loooooooser
wakeywakey (2010-08-07 11:37:45)
This is hilarious, but soccer is not a girly sport. Tell that to three torn ACl's and a broken femur and tibia. It's extremely dangerous and takes more than just being able to run fast to play.
Fart head (2010-08-07 02:20:51)
I pooped on a cow once. hehe
Trollercoaster (2010-08-03 18:33:37)
Any sport with rules is gay. That's why I kill people without regret, with the skull of an ox, just for fun.
asdf (2010-08-02 09:27:28)
if soccer was gay, why the fuck would the whole world play it?
Justin Bieber @jacks (2010-07-31 03:46:30)
You stfu or i will clown on you fool -JB
jackson @ bieber (2010-07-31 02:09:32)
stfu homie
Justin Bieber (2010-07-30 11:26:33)
Hey guys i am justin bieber i think this one is the best =D -JB
lolwut? (2010-07-26 19:15:57)
"try flat out sprinting for 5 miles you pussies" Seeing as how pro sprinters sprint 400meters, I doubt that you know what you're saying. Perhaps you mean sprinting with tuned up cars?
Seut (2010-07-26 14:59:30)
Like the others, but this one is just gay.
ExtremeChessGuy (2010-07-21 02:10:07)
Fkin A! AFussbowl sucks culo pendejos bishes, u gringos eat my bawlz maricas
MetheMe (2010-07-19 16:26:58)
I love sports. My favorite is WoW. Turning in quests is such a rush, tho pvp is for lamers.
Rex (2010-07-19 15:15:29)
Baseball is all wrong. A man cannot walk with 4 balls.
ashley (2010-07-18 14:14:44)
sorry mike looks like you got pwnd this time. love your stuff though keep it going. are there any where the person jokes back instead of getting pissed?
Eric (2010-07-17 19:31:21)
Fuckin' Ace! The person had the perfect reaction!
eyebeeweazy (2010-07-17 17:35:11)
I play real sports, aint trying to be the best at exercising
Truth Teller (2010-07-17 13:04:51)
The people who are knocking down sports ("try flat out sprinting for 5 miles you pussies," etc.) are all fat basement-dweller with Cheetos-stained T-Shirts.
ghebagheba (2010-07-16 16:01:52)
water polo, soccer, and rugby r the best sports ever made in my opinion
J (2010-07-16 15:47:42)
@weak haha maybe ill try cross country if I when I decide to have the body of a pre-pubescent girl. Till then, I'll stick to hockey.
mlee (2010-07-16 03:59:15)
hockey is the best sport = athleticism + fights in one. football is just a bunch of guys in tights humping and touching each others' asses, and soccer produces guys like david beckham and cristiano ronaldo. prettyyyyy gay, i'd say.
True Facts (2010-07-13 09:39:27)
Everyone in these comments who is knocking sports is fat.
ronaldophalus (2010-07-12 04:15:51)
soccer... rugby... nfl... fag sports. try some fucking badminton... extreme shit.
420 (2010-07-08 22:15:24)
"I saw him in Philly a few years ago, blowing some guy in an alley." lol
well (2010-07-08 20:40:57)
well, football is the most faggest game ever
Anonymous (2010-07-08 03:21:26)
Yeah soccer looks like the most recreational sport out of them all. Well, other than baseball... Just a light sprint, kick the ball to someone else, and then sit back and wait for the ball to come back, then repeat.
anonymous (2010-07-08 02:55:50)
All sports but wrestling are gay. Nothing like rolling around with another man on a mat wearing a tights to demonstrate manliness!
weak (2010-07-07 20:41:25)
why dont you pussies try a real sport and take up cross country running? fuck your 90 minutes of light jogging, and your padded 10 second touch-fests. try flat out sprinting for 5 miles and see how that works for you
cuntgrinder (2010-07-05 04:20:13)
Real men (Americans)play NFL Football Effeminate half fagots (the rest of the world ) play soccer, until they make cock sucking an Olympic sport you 3rd world fux will always be just a bunch of fags
calc (2010-07-01 15:21:15)
absolutely hilarious, words cant discribe how good this is. props man, mad props.
MyNameIsASecret (2010-06-28 22:33:54)
This shit is funny. Dude, you are a total asshole. I am thinking about putting up my own ad so you can piss me off. I need the motivation. @ anonymous(es): Check it, they do that injury shit in a lot of other sports and besides, American sports take b
lol@katie (2010-06-28 19:50:20)
no, rugby is for retards that like brain damage, duh duh duh. It explains alot from where it comes from LOL
Hiruma Youichi (2010-06-28 19:00:48)
Only pieces of shit play soccer! American football is the best! Full of action and it's not looking like fucking gay dancing! Ya-Ha!
Neggan (2010-06-27 20:13:08)
Even tho I'm a huge fan of soccer, this shit is hilarous!!
Katie (2010-06-26 00:33:25)
as if american football is manly, with all that padding and protection. Rugby is for proper men
Wow (2010-06-25 16:56:20)
Well, everyone's taking this too seriously.
anonymous (2010-06-24 21:10:09)
Anyone saying that there is no contact and/or "soccer" is a girly sport doesn't have a clue what they're talking about. Try to dribble past me and I'll kick you in your fucking knee. Lets see if you even walk after that. Besides, I
anonymous (2010-06-24 20:56:11)
What the dude below me said is 100% true. If soccer were full contact half the team would be on the sidelines feigning injury before the second half. Fuck soccer, get out and play a sport that "Puts some hair on your chest!"
Anonymous (2010-06-24 15:01:07)
Soccer is a girly sport. Every ten seconds a guy falls down grabbing his leg in pain or clutching his head like the guy next to him took a hammer to it. GET UP AND PLAY THE GAME! THIS ISN'T DRAMA CLASS!
kobe (2010-06-22 19:34:13)
Kobe
aaron (2010-06-22 06:04:23)
football sucks... soccer is at least fun you stupid crotch crickets.
lolmeh (2010-06-19 18:06:48)
this was the only one i didnt like... bcuz, actually, soccer is a man sporto lol not like golf, or swimming "oh hai i'm michael phelps and i'm a fag" , and what's up with baseball, i never gonna get wtf is that sport... so... this tim
Caleb (2010-06-19 17:35:16)
FYI I was forced to give oral to that man. He was very abusive and I did not like it one bit.
Jeah Cee (2010-06-17 20:24:11)
You're amazing.
Stinky (2010-06-17 16:34:12)
Hey americanfootbalisgay, pull up your panties, put on some leotards and you can be a field fairy too. Was that you in Philly? Bwaaaaaa!
guy (2010-06-16 22:01:30)
"Anyway, I kept my gatherings in my shed out back as a testament to my manliness..." awesome
americanfootbalisgay (2010-06-16 21:15:58)
fucking american football is gay.. go make up a real sport next time instead of a bunch of man hugging each other.. homos
Rooney (2010-06-16 17:50:34)
Guys.. pro soccer dudes arent always pussies.. google jaap stam or rooney.. now go fk yourself with your american football while i play the REAL football
cheko (2010-06-09 22:14:08)
very funny......How about you take your shotgun and stick it up your ass and pull the trigger? hahahahaha!
FYI (2010-06-08 16:56:34)
just saying in spain soccer is called footbal.
Mike Ock (2010-06-08 16:49:42)
I'm sure you are the catcher!
Mike Ock (2010-06-08 16:49:04)
"anonymous (2010-05-28 18:12:23)to anonymous with the dirt bike comment. I play baseball. I can ride a dirtbike. How much would you like to bet that you can't hit my pitching or anyone else's at my level? K thx" Pitcher? Yeah right...
soccerisforfags (2010-06-07 14:55:26)
This is too funny. Take that field fairy shit over to europe. This is america bitch.
soccerisforfags (2010-06-07 14:55:16)
This is too funny. Take that field fairy shit over to europe. This is america bitch.
anonymous (2010-06-05 11:16:13)
soccer rules, football is for fags who like to jump on each other and give hugs while runing..
anonymous (2010-05-29 12:52:12)
Caleb? Tsk tsk tsk. Bruce or Tarquine would have been better
anonymous (2010-05-28 18:12:23)
to anonymous with the dirt bike comment. I play baseball. I can ride a dirtbike. How much would you like to bet that you can't hit my pitching or anyone else's at my level? K thx
anonymous (2010-05-27 02:11:14)
"How about you take your shotgun and stick it up your ass and pull the trigger? Go fuck yourself." Apparently, someone can't take a joke
DahcDerron (2010-05-26 14:45:36)
Hilarious! and LOL @ Caleb
Dork (2010-05-23 16:37:37)
WaR: American football is called "football" because it's derived from a medieval game of the same name. It was so named not because the foot is used to control the ball but because it was played on foot, as opposed to on horseback, like most s
WaR (2010-05-18 20:22:45)
Football where you dont use ur foot in anyway except once in a blue moon to hit it through 2 big poles ? srsly!
anonymous (2010-05-16 23:45:12)
Soccer, Football, and Baseball all just take one ball to play, motocross takes two.
Pillar (2010-05-16 23:43:43)
The whole deal is to find a moral boundary and cross it - which is what makes this shit highly amusing. - A Fan.
Stupid?! (2010-05-13 19:06:04)
I don't get how you guys can take this eriously, it is hilarious. It is all true, except for the fact that real men go hunt animals with shotguns. Real men race the animal and then wrestle it to the ground eating it alive.
Annoyed (2010-05-12 18:09:53)
Ndamukong*
Annoyed (2010-05-12 18:08:37)
He went 2nd in the NFL draft and he said himself that his soccer skills help him on the football field.
Annoyed (2010-05-12 18:05:59)
Seriously, people. Soccer is a tough sport to play. Football isn't the only sport that requires you to be tough. Ndamukon Suh, the awesome football player from UNL, played soccer before football.
Caleb (2010-05-12 07:43:00)
i am very offended, we gay people have rights too you know, ass holes.
ACE (2010-05-11 16:30:36)
I like soccer and this shit is still hilarious
Soccer IS Football (2010-05-10 03:47:54)
LOL, funny. Soccer is the very manly, first about soccer history, once upon time they were playing with a severed heads of enemies. the rules of soccer is to use FOOT not hand & bump into other guys and jump over them like American football. lol
Franky (2010-05-03 15:47:25)
Hey it turns out it was The Jesus from The Big Lebowski!!! "take your shotgun and stick it up your ass and pull the trigger (until it goes "click") "
I jizzed (2010-05-02 23:08:23)
laughing
mike (2010-05-01 11:37:44)
caleb said: "lol it is weird when a joke had my name in it" hey caleb, how's Philly these days?
ltk (2010-04-30 14:28:06)
"Please, you aren't kicking anyone's ass." Hahahaaa.. Love the way he put him in his place...
Liz (2010-04-29 21:35:08)
i just peed a little.
Stever (2010-04-29 10:27:56)
My mistake, I assumed it was for your daughter because it is soccer - almost pissed myself laughing.
caleb (2010-04-29 06:28:33)
lol it is weird when a joke had my name in it
slow your roll (2010-04-29 01:03:17)
Everyone knows real men hunt, play football, Own weapons, and beat up gays in their spare time.
slow your roll (2010-04-29 01:03:16)
Everyone knows real men hunt, play football, Own weapons, and beat up gays in their spare time.
wizz (2010-04-23 15:54:36)
haha woah! XD
@Garrett (2010-04-20 23:07:05)
its spelled IMMIGRANT. PPl like You gives U.S.A. a bad name. I bet "imagrents" know how to spell IMMIGRANTS better than you, DUMBASS.
csodar (2010-04-20 11:29:10)
I went to 2 gamestop stores and none of em sold F.E.A.R. Extraction Point so i was searching the internet if there is any download for FEAR FULL VERSION. i only found 1 download which was a virus. so can anyone please post a link to download the game?? Or
FunnyShit (2010-04-20 08:40:35)
Thats some funny shit! I hate the word soccer though. It's football. You use your feet to kick a ball, football. What Americans call football is using your hands to throw an egg....Handegg...?! As for gayness, yeah, footballers are pretty gay falling
Garrett (2010-04-20 03:11:22)
Soccer is for fuckin imagrents
lol (2010-04-20 03:10:06)
lol you all fail.
jerry (2010-04-20 00:30:17)
more people have died playing soccer than football.
a pissed off guy (2010-04-19 18:16:12)
Soccer and Football arn't gay you dumbfucks. I'll shove me 50cal up your asses and pull the fucking trigger, how would you like that?
pino (2010-04-19 17:36:17)
soccer is gay
rei (2010-04-17 16:38:47)
so... it seems like a lot of guys commenting this flamed other sports. football isn't gay. american football isn't gay either, and nor is rugby. there. argument settled. WOOPEE -party-. on another note: i do prefer american football to rugby, b
hurling (2010-04-16 10:21:38)
Both soccer and football, are considered gay. You guys like to shower together?
Soccer (2010-04-15 21:01:18)
Soccer is not gay. If soccer is gay than so is more than half of the world. Kobe Bryant likes to play soccer more than he does basketball. you better not call him gay
rickrolled (2010-04-15 15:10:15)
All this soccer talk is 'gaying up the place'.
no nancyboys (2010-04-15 14:25:55)
What's gayer than gay? Soccer. What's gayer than soccer? Nothing.
badmitten or soccer? (2010-04-15 14:19:41)
What's gayer, badmitten (you British/French/Spanish fags might know it better as shuttlecock) or soccer?
and cashing checks (2010-04-15 14:09:36)
Europeans saying "step into the octagon", the US is THE mma scene. You are not only gay but also stupid.
snapping necks (2010-04-15 14:07:04)
The comment from getyousome is great. "...this is america and we snap necks and cash checks."
bend it like beckham (2010-04-15 13:58:12)
David Beckham plays soccer. He is about as metrosexual gay as they get.
stay on point (2010-04-15 13:56:48)
The discussion is on soccer, not rugby. Stay on point people. Soccer is gay.
silky short shorts (2010-04-15 13:48:39)
Silky short shorts. Anything more to say?
Soccer Is Gay (2010-04-15 13:46:13)
It's awesome that Europeans are now realizing we think they are gayer than gay for playing soccer.
anonymous (2010-04-14 22:45:14)
Soccer is the world's sport World cup finals have 720 million viewers to the Superbowl's 50 million. Rugby doesn't count because it is only played by three (maybe) countries funny joke though
Nick4126 (2010-04-13 20:03:20)
Sry, one more thing. I apologize for all the American's here that are saying other countries are...well.. worse than us. Please realize that not all American's are sooooo....Stupid ^_^
Nick4126 (2010-04-13 20:01:10)
And to those who are telling people to die. What the heck? Are your opinions THAT strong that you would kill someone because they play a sport. Please grow up. This is some funny stuff!!! Good Job
Nick4126 (2010-04-13 19:59:40)
Hahaha Read most of the comments, you guys are hilarious. Please don't get offended at these post, they are just jokes. you are falling for it like the people he is emailing LOL
Zloduska (2010-04-09 21:42:26)
Sports. *yaaaawn* So boring, why even get upset about it?
Rhino (2010-04-09 14:06:04)
Rugby: No Padding, No Helmets, Just Balls! Same players play 80 minutes. (some play on for 10 minutes with fractured skulls) Real football/soccer same players play 90 minutes None of this changing teams crap, stop, go, stop go. Yawn.
Le dude (2010-04-09 07:37:49)
is football like our European rugby, but with a lot of protection so the gays don't get hurt??? PUSSIES!!!!
Vinny (2010-04-07 01:33:24)
Not sure how soccer got the reputation of being gay. Still funny as hell nonetheless.
blowme (2010-04-05 10:14:08)
not as funny...i beat that kid up.
Lol (2010-04-02 20:14:01)
This is so funny :p
DURRR (2010-03-27 23:39:28)
as many people as you like (READ: if you only have one person to play with, you can play 1:1)
DURRR (2010-03-27 23:38:46)
I can't believe the majority of you idiots don't realize why soccer/European football is the most popular sport in the world: it takes essentially no equipment (a single ball or ball-shaped object)(read: anyone can AFFORD it) and you can play with
anonymous (2010-03-22 09:29:14)
Funniest post - the one claiming Spain as 1st world. You silly, almost certainly smelly Spaniard!
Yep (2010-03-21 20:35:33)
That's the only way any real man eat's his fuckin' deer kill.
jimbot (2010-03-18 15:31:13)
I have played both and for sure football hits hurt a lot worse than rugby hits. In football you aren't worried about crushing your skull so you don't hold back like you do in rugby
jimbot (2010-03-18 15:28:14)
The funny thing is that people on here saying football is for pussies and rugby is for men have most likely never played either.
Anonymous (2010-03-17 17:20:02)
It's a joke, idiots. Quit with the soccer vs football bullshit.
dsg3224 (2010-03-17 13:13:07)
Dude, I think this was your finest work! You're famous in my office. BTW, where the hell did you get the name "Caleb" from. That just friggin sealed it for me!
NFL IS GAY (2010-03-16 23:34:56)
NFL IS GAY RUGBY IS A MAN'S SPORT YOU'RE ALL FAGGOTS GO DIE OF CANCER
Roscoe (2010-03-16 13:27:38)
Pro soccer players act like little girls whenever they get "hurt" on the field, when replays show they were barely touched. THAT'S why soccer is gay.
anonymous (2010-03-15 14:32:32)
Raktel and the rest of the 3rd world need to realize that REAL Football(NFL)requires strength agility balls and backbone,Something you will not find outside the US of A The 3rd world ie-Canada And all the padding they can possibly fit on to their lumbe
tielor2d (2010-03-15 14:25:34)
as a soccer player, i still find this freaking hilarious ... get a sense of humor people
A dude (2010-03-14 18:48:14)
By the way, the "gibberish" you're talking about is one of the most difficult languages for american's to learn. Oh, by the way, Spanish is from Spain, which happens to be a 1st World country. It is in the European Union, after all.
A dude (2010-03-14 18:45:33)
Soccer and American Football are games. JUST. GAMES. Stop degrading other people just because they prefer Football Soccer or American Football. See, it's quite easy to give an opinion and not insult everyone. You should try doing that.
3rd wrld panzies 3 (2010-03-14 11:33:55)
ng in simple enough terms for you to comprende mi amigo , Soccer=Hoto , Football(NFL)=los hombres de verdad ( I love speaking 3rd world gibberish they are funny little savage bastards )
3rd world panzies 2 (2010-03-14 11:27:58)
the UK , Australia , Scandanavia etc. has none of those qualities you cant teach balls and backbone you have to be born with it . watching a bunch os effeminate sissy's playing pattycake with their girlly little feet makes me sick . I hope I am speaki
3rd world panzies (2010-03-14 11:20:42)
Raktel and the rest of the 3rd world need to realize that REAL Football(NFL)requires strength agility balls and backbone,Something you will not find outside the US of A The 3rd world ie-Canada
Raktel is an ass (2010-03-12 18:47:34)
Raktel... if you barely used your feet in football then the players would go nowhere.... or be upright for that matter.... do you have feet?
tyson (2010-03-12 03:29:55)
haha this one is awsome! hahaha soccer fags
Mike (2010-03-10 08:01:36)
You use 95% of your feet, eh Raktel?
hotpocket420 (2010-03-07 19:43:07)
This one is actually pretty offensive... But I like the others <3
tinman (2010-03-05 16:54:37)
Saying Rubgy has more contact then football is like saying soccer has more scoring than basketball.
tinman (2010-03-05 16:52:16)
Please,Raktel you have never played football or rugby, or sport that requires contact, or balls that weren't attached to a man. go back to Guatemala and kick a stick around.
flame war (2010-03-04 21:43:36)
epic flames
Raktel (2010-03-04 12:54:37)
hen think about American Football. There is less contact than in Rugby and you have to wear armor (where in rugby you don't). Plus if you ask me, a bunch of big black men touching themselves sounds just...wrong?
Raktel (2010-03-04 12:53:35)
Soccer = Football American Football = Rugby for pussies. Seriously. Soccer is called Football because you use 95% your feet. American football shouldn't be called football, you barely use your feet. Seriously if you think Football is for pussies t
czi (2010-03-03 19:49:02)
Football = Manly Rugby = Pretty awesome American football (handegg) = WTF L2P NABS?!
fuckrugby (2010-03-02 17:13:20)
Yeah rugby = stitches and bruises. Football = concussions and broken bones.
padmynutz (2010-03-02 17:11:46)
The padding only stops you from being fucking killed, not from being hurt.
padmynutz (2010-03-02 17:10:25)
No rugby player has ever hit anyone half as hard as football players do. Padding or not, that shit hurts.
rugby (2010-02-28 16:31:53)
football is for fags, they need all that padding and shit. Go get some hairs on y'alls chest and play rugby.
ryan (2010-02-23 18:56:43)
baseball rocks and is not a pansy sport. it takes balls to get hit by a 80+ mph round object. also soccer is for fags....bottom line
jasgeh970 (2010-02-23 08:30:59)
I don't care how many people watched the World Cup; it only proves how many people love gay sports. And if you don't own a shotgun and/or a power saw you are clearly not a man. Get over your fascination with boring-ass soccer, or futbol, or what
fuckoffLuffie (2010-02-22 20:12:01)
go blow caleb in an alley !
ShutUpLuffie (2010-02-22 11:13:06)
OMG shut up Luffie, nobody cares!!!
Luffie (2010-02-19 20:57:42)
My computer had a virus and we got it rebooted and after getting it rebooted there is no sound but when I go on device manager and check it says the sound is fine and games that require sound are playing I think it has something to do with the settings. I
football dude (2010-02-19 14:25:06)
soccer is the most popular sport in the world because poor kids can play, doens't take much to tape up a volleyball and find a field. pussies
anonymous (2010-02-19 01:46:24)
Actually Idiot, the World cup drew 1.5 billions views. The Super Bowl drew 95 million... Someone needs to go back to second grade and re-learn "numbers".
JJ (2010-02-18 13:08:39)
Sorry, *watched* a hockey match.
JJ (2010-02-18 13:07:50)
[continued from last post] hockey match.
JJ (2010-02-18 13:07:12)
You have to admit that Baseball is more of a pansy's sport than football(soccer). You just stand around, run after a small ball and stuff. It's a slightly better copy of Test cricket. Rugby is better to watch than the others, though ive never wat
tinman (2010-02-17 12:40:30)
Oh, and soccer is for guys who couldn't make the football team, or get laid for that matter.
tinman (2010-02-17 12:39:25)
Nar, you're in idiot for thinking I'm intending that as factual. It is a joke! I just like fucking with Europeans.
FTL (2010-02-16 23:44:38)
I play soccer AND football, both are good sports, accept the joke for what it is and move on FANBOYS!
anonymous (2010-02-16 19:45:26)
football is a bitch sport, little guys think there tough cuz they can run into people.... i played for 3 years, bunch of bitches, i play soccer now much better
nipple (2010-02-16 03:23:10)
wow superslide, you're an idiot.
Dita (2010-02-15 22:50:09)
My mistake, I assumed it was for your daughter because it is soccer. LMAO!!
Randall (2010-02-15 14:18:35)
What is this sport soccer he refers to in the email? I do know of the world most popular sport, football, which is played with the feet by the way. Soccer, however is a name I am not familiar with. Anyway Rugby is a real mans game, which takes more balls
nonconscious (2010-02-15 00:46:51)
Caleb you're a complete moron. Why do you think people would assume you're gay just because of your name?
Caleb (2010-02-13 23:40:33)
Hey my name is caleb ass hole. just kidding you stuff is funny but my name is really Caleb so yeah theres that to consider.(i have an amazing girlfriend so im not gay
football for the win (2010-02-13 17:28:44)
go football. soccer players can go fuck yourselves. oh wait you already do that.
Omg.... (2010-02-13 16:54:38)
Well i dont have much against football, its a sport. But soccer is also. If you ask me soccer takes more athletisism, If you play a sport then its fine. Stop bitching about which is better, its a never ending debate.
Gofuckurselffootball (2010-02-13 16:48:33)
congrats, fucktards. If you wanna play a sport that actually involves altheltisism and skill then play something besides football.
Gofuckurselffootball (2010-02-13 16:47:23)
Footballs linemen are a joke. It basicly how much weight you can stack on and still be able to slowly move your feet. The only position that takes skill is the Quarterback. You all pride yourself that you can move 100 yards to score a touchdown in 4 hours
Gofuckurselffootball (2010-02-13 16:45:09)
fucking play. If you wanna full contact sport without 20lbs of pads on try the octagon bitches. Your football ass's wouldn't last ten seconds in it! The whole match would revolve around how many hits to ur head you can take b4 fallin on ur fatass.
Gofuckurselffootball (2010-02-13 16:42:47)
Soccer is the worlds most popular sport u dumbass. Maybe all you football lovers are all reatarded cuz of all the hits to the head you took when you played football. Its okay i forgive you lack of athletics. You get a 20-40 seconds break between every fuc
NAR (2010-02-13 15:06:09)
SuperSlide - totally wrong, 700 million watch the soccer WC final, 300 million watch the draw to see who plays who (which is 3 x the amount who watch the superbowl). Idiot.
NAR (2010-02-13 15:05:58)
tinman - you're an idiot, you have no grasp of historical fact at all.
KY Stomper (2010-02-12 14:20:22)
KY you are a moron.
Mackums (2010-02-11 15:03:30)
This smacks of Maddox. Fantastic work all around.
shutyourpiehole (2010-02-11 08:37:39)
I guarantee any one of you would play/watch any sport if it was the one you grew up with. Bottom line, men love/need sports. Can't you all just get along? Ban together and bash women. You know you all love sports, one kind or another.
shutyourpiehole (2010-02-11 08:36:56)
#2 The comments prove that men (in general) are idiots. Arguing about which sport is better. Geez. Just measure your dicks and post that. Sports are all just excuses for me to use their excess testosterone. I guarantee any one of you would play/watch any
shutyourpiehole (2010-02-11 08:35:53)
#1 Funny Site, not the best one of these, I agree that the cheap "gay" insults are too easy and 3rd grade. You're better than that but the site is great - thanks for the laughs. #2 The comments prove that men (in general) are idiots. Arguin
Nick (2010-02-11 00:18:47)
Epic.
anonymous (2010-02-10 23:40:25)
Soccer is not for gays...
anonymous (2010-02-10 18:11:29)
american 'football' is rugby for pussies! get the padding off bitches!
Robin (2010-02-10 17:56:01)
I laughed so hard at "There is nothing more manly than blowing a deer's head off and eating the raw venison from its neck." Comedy genius. XD
Dude (2010-02-10 14:26:04)
What Kite Runner references are you talking about?
tehehe (2010-02-10 14:19:43)
I really liked the kite runner references. to bad no one seems to have noticed.
Borat (2010-02-10 00:58:42)
In Kazakhstan we love soccer! It is the only sport we can play while still having homosexual alter-egos!
tape (2010-02-09 16:39:01)
fuck football, soccer is amazing
chewy (2010-02-09 16:24:07)
soccer is for faggots
Beef (2010-02-04 02:40:08)
getyousome: seriously dude, you need to get over yourself. P.S. Mike, funny shit!
getyousome (2010-02-02 14:21:27)
sure soccer is the most popular sport in the world, in motherfuckin 3rd world countries. this is america and we snap necks and cash checks. the fuckin lions would butt fuck any futbol team in the world in a fight
american soccer (2010-02-01 21:36:10)
fuck football
tinman (2010-02-01 15:24:02)
Also, @ Jenny. I am a history major at Dartmouth, so I don't think I need a fucking history lesson from you.
tinman (2010-02-01 15:18:31)
Then with some Russian help we steam rolled the Germans for the French pussies while on the other side of the world we were handling some Japanese ass pretty much all by ourselves.
tinman (2010-02-01 15:15:58)
The French took two weeks of ass whooping and then rolled over and consigned themselves to taking German dick to French mouth for the rest of their lives
tinman (2010-02-01 15:14:34)
If they weren't pussies they wouldn't have needed help. I at least respect the English for standing up and fighting
Jenny (2010-01-30 13:08:18)
plex than that. And don't forget that it was the French who bankrolled our country's Revolution and, without them, we would not have gained independence from England when we did.
Jenny (2010-01-30 13:06:34)
Tinman, you may want to learn a little history before you go yapping your incorrect, incoherent mouth. The United States' involvement in WWII wasn't because "Europeans are pussies" and they needed our help. It is a hell of a lot more com
tinman (2010-01-29 16:15:20)
Also, if you are French. Your national sport isn't soccer. It's surrendering to the (Germans, English, Spanish fuck pretty much whoever wants start shit with you) Celebrate that fucking beret wearing pussies.
tinman (2010-01-29 16:10:38)
Europeans are just jealous because the U.S. is the one with the biggest dick. Sorry for protecting your pansie asses from the nazi's since you clearly couldn't handle that shit by yourself. Next time you want to talk shit about the U.S. think ab
Hater Troll (2010-01-26 23:25:50)
Its amazing how worked up you fucking fags get over a joke and arueing over which sport is better. Just leave a good comment and shut the fuck up
William (2010-01-25 19:06:39)
hahahahhahah
MyDickYourMouth (2010-01-25 03:48:50)
To clear up some incorrect facts... World cup final has over double the views as the superbowl... And for all you faggots that are beaking soccer for not being a manly sport and than saying American football is... Shut the fuck up and step inside the octa
anonymous. (2010-01-23 12:44:32)
my boyfriend plays soccer :O he's not gay lol its really a tough sport to play it isnt girly or whatever :p lol
soccer (2010-01-22 10:57:58)
is gay
THE REAL FOOTBALL (2010-01-17 03:07:03)
The original football kicks ass. fuck haters
fuck football (2010-01-14 19:31:08)
and soccer hockeys a rougher and harder to play sport. hockey players get recognition for playing on a broken ankle, soccer players get recognition for playing after having previously dislocated a shoulder.
SuperSlide (2010-01-14 01:11:19)
Just to clear things up, the SuperBowl gets more views than the finals of the World Cup so SUCK IT FOOTBALL HATERS (just felt like i had to throw that out there)
Pigskin-ball (2010-01-12 15:50:35)
I'm American and absolutely curse American football, mainly because of the name which it has nothing to do with. Additionally, REAL Football...soccer in the U.S., requires peak physical fitness to run/sprint 90+ minutes and each and every player on th
Dont_feed_the_trolls (2010-01-08 21:45:48)
In the game called football you can't touch the ball with your hands. The american 'football' is a version of rugby for junkie pussies. :D
Anonymous (2010-01-07 01:51:45)
I can tell how much a shitstorm this one brewed by looking at the side bar's size.
Gynophile (2010-01-06 02:18:59)
A "real man's" sport is lasting longer than 5 minutes in the bedroom.
anonymous (2010-01-04 01:31:15)
I was laughing so hard until I read the part about the gay guy named caleb... MY NAME IS CALEB(not gay)! But you know... whatever =) P.S. Love this blog!
anonymous (2010-01-04 01:29:04)
I love how people can get so worked up over something that in the end has no meaning in life. (I'm also amazed right now at how this thread went from soccer to national pride with countless sexual insults in between)
soccer4life (2010-01-03 21:24:06)
i'm a flamer
England. (2010-01-01 03:32:43)
Fuckin eurofags go pussy out on d day while we do all the fighting. no seriously i heard that the french flag is made of velcro so you can take the red and blue bits off in case war happens. In b4 racism :)
Domo. (2009-12-28 21:16:23)
Thank you.
Junior72 (2009-12-22 21:09:45)
THAT WAS FUNNY
jorge (2009-12-22 20:37:03)
fuckin funny.
bahahahaha! (2009-12-22 10:46:49)
I dont care who you are, soccer fan or soccer hater but this post is hilarious!!
wherethefuckami (2009-12-21 12:42:59)
and anon, the one and only reason for the business world for revolving so much on english, is becouse you fucktards and inbred brittish cunts dont know how to speak anything else. :)
wherethefuckami (2009-12-21 12:40:29)
about soccer, it ok, but the thing that you play with a bloody riot gear on, try to move 3 feet forward for Ѕ hour with a 10 men, and you find that interesting? Rugby is ok, becouse you dont wear a fucking apocalypse armor and helmet, just mano a mano.
football is so gay.. (2009-12-21 07:40:51)
hey you football fans, we don't wear any shields like you while we are playing soccer...we even doN't wear thin and skinny pants under us...
soccerisgay (2009-12-21 03:45:00)
You butthurt Europeans are funny. Australia agrees, soccer is for pansies.
anonymous (2009-12-19 16:14:04)
soccer is the metric system of sports. even if the rest of the world agrees fuck you. cos america has the bombs. there's a reason business the world over is conducted in english (lingua franca) and it ain't cos jolly old england is a financial
oddvar (2009-12-19 13:36:59)
Football is the best sport in the world. American football is shaite and only played by pussies. Rugby is better.
anonymous (2009-12-17 06:40:15)
You idiots! Soccer (better known as Football) is more popular than your "American Football" will ever be. Bunch of jock strap wearing cunts. Oh and about a billion more people agree...
The LOX (2009-12-12 14:56:15)
Literally lmao
rezablade (2009-12-12 07:14:27)
fucking perfect. You started off with "youre daughter" hahahaha your fucking daughter! omg man and this fucking idiot keeps emailing back asking for more. this is hilarious dude!
jmw59 (2009-12-11 16:28:24)
classic :)
yeahhh (2009-12-11 16:06:48)
Soccer is absurdly gay. worst sport ever
Futbцl? (2009-12-10 00:25:56)
Idk it seems fun to play and it's really fun watching FIFA but the facts are facts, soccer isn't the most manly sport in America, rventhough I personally like it more than baseball and basketball. Anyways, these emails were hilarious! Haha I like
Wynapgwyn (2009-12-09 23:21:41)
holy crap you guy's never heard of rugby? It's like american football without the armo(u)r. Have you seen a game? it's like cagefighting with rules
ShotSaw (2009-12-08 17:37:27)
Best line ever - "I need to make room for my new shotgun and power saw."
marlton jefferies (2009-12-07 17:05:24)
OMG just the name CALEB is so gay, I think I knew a caleb growing up and im 200percent sure hes gay
farmer arbuckle (2009-12-05 10:41:37)
soccer is gay
bill d (2009-12-03 20:33:41)
Fuc*in hilarious, had me crying..and for you people who take it seriously, why are you even on this site
I'm not merideth bax (2009-12-03 17:32:32)
but I want to come out in front of all of you and say that I'm gay.
anonymous (2009-12-03 12:35:13)
DavihRodrigues: here in the US, soccer is gay, guns are manly. Hence, our empire.
Star (2009-12-02 22:06:08)
@ DavihRodrigues My friend, I'm European living in the US and for me still football is what they call here "soccer". But, take it easy, it's only a joke. laugh
Star (2009-12-02 22:01:09)
It's so funny! I was crying! Bunny Slippers!!!!!!
DavihRodrigues (2009-12-02 18:57:30)
I must say you're wrong... What is a sport for MEN? The european one is the REAL football, not what you guys play, wearing those fancy helmets and jumping upon each other like a bunch of maricones
sherpes (2009-12-02 13:46:59)
Reminiscent of how the Onion's sports page has a header that reads "women's sports/soccer."
Rachel (2009-11-29 11:48:28)
Oh my god. This is fucking hilarious!!! I was actually CRYING i was laughing so hard! My new favorite website!!! ahahahaha
justinjara (2009-11-28 18:14:36)
every last one of the are so f'ing funny
DunkanDonuts (2009-11-28 05:48:01)
You should sign your next one "Duncan".
anonymous (2009-11-27 19:20:12)
i miss duncan...
lul (2009-11-25 14:23:02)
whole lotta vaginas in here
rss (2009-11-24 13:39:47)
add an rss feed for fuck's sake.
Frank (2009-11-23 13:21:17)
OMG!! That was just brutal. I love soccer, but this joke is just hysterical! One of these days you are going to get yourself in some big trouble dude.! Keep it up!
The rev (2009-11-22 05:43:59)
I like soccer (european football) and found this fucking hilarious. It is a joke people and it is fucking funny :)
asshole (2009-11-20 10:44:18)
i am an american!
anonymous (2009-11-19 22:41:20)
the below and above are obviously jokes for humor, chill people
anonymous (2009-11-19 22:39:49)
a bunch of skinny lawn dwarfs running around doing nothing with no strategy was too gay and girly to be referred to as football, so Americans created a game that actually took a balance of intelligence and strength to play (hence man play it, not girls or
Cccc (2009-11-19 20:13:17)
then what in the world do you call football (as in tackling, and a diamond-y shaped brown ball, w/quarterbacks etc) over where you live?
anti (2009-11-19 15:53:22)
There is no such thing as soccer, you dumb americans. There is football and american pussified rugby. Seriously, why the fuck are you calling it football?
Eric (2009-11-19 11:20:21)
This is so funny. hate to be the person on the other side who now thinks his kid is a girl...
Idiocracy (2009-11-14 13:05:45)
ritical statements piss me off too, and this is likely one of them. However done for a humorous reasons it work perfectly. Stop getting all anal over him calling soccer gay and have a good laugh.
Idiocracy (2009-11-14 13:04:53)
to anyone getting pissed at him calling soccer a girl sport. He has done this simply to mess with THIS guy, not everyone who likes soccer. He may like soccer himself and is saying soccer is gay only to piss off a father. It is the point of his site. Hypoc
anonymous (2009-11-13 17:13:31)
Just like rugby, football is just an excuse for men to grope each other without being called fags. Compared to that, soccer isn't gay at all.
Tony (2009-11-10 14:32:00)
Anyone on here debating if soccer is a girl's or a boy's sport because of this hilarious email has completely and utterly missed the point of this site. Be ashamed.
Michael (2009-11-06 13:31:37)
Listen, Europe, if you want people to stop saying that soccer isn't manly, get your guys to stop crying and stuff during the games. Just saying.
anonymous (2009-11-06 11:15:56)
God damn, I hope most of you people re trolls. If you take offense to anything said in these e-mails then you're a fucking retard. It's all a joke.
Jack Mehoff (2009-11-06 10:42:45)
Soccer is queer, I don't care who you are or what country you are from. Or what cunt you are from for that matter.
well... (2009-11-05 22:08:55)
This one was kinda stupid. Hint: all sorta people love soccer and its actually a global sport, unlike the 'world' series we have. I still prefer football over soccer but i didnt like this exchange.
wtf (2009-11-05 08:07:54)
soccer and girl sport? dontevenreply.com guy fuck off
lol'er (2009-11-05 05:26:50)
lol
Rob (2009-11-04 11:04:33)
I think I love you Mike, will you marry me Brokeback style?
NEVILL (2009-11-04 09:14:28)
MURPH, SENSOR TRHIS AND READ TO YOUR KIDS
emka (2009-11-03 14:17:12)
yeah, because American football is SOOO manly. Bunch of wankers with paddings...
gay yank (2009-11-03 09:47:44)
hockey is for faggots
Confession (2009-11-03 06:17:42)
To be honest, lately I just can't seem to get my mind right. Sorry to have troubled you, but I do feel a little better now. Also, would anyone like to get a game of poker going on this comments forum? Texas Hold 'em?
oneBeer2many (2009-11-02 16:39:15)
Soccer is a girl's sport. Have you seen these fags prancing around the field? Boys need to play football, baseball or hockey.
Douchebag (2009-11-02 13:41:02)
haha football boots! You brits always say football is the right name for a sport that you kick a ball around and your right. But BOOTS? Come on, they aren't boots!
Spectre (2009-11-02 08:57:27)
OMG, awesome. Im going on a hunting trip very soon with some friends. I may suggest the deer, head, venison thing, and see what they say :p
LOL (2009-11-01 20:48:20)
im all for equality but damm this was funny as hell
Matt (2009-10-30 21:56:47)
I take it cleats is what yanks call football boots?
MBII (2009-10-29 10:36:29)
that guy is so fucking retarded if he thinks soccer isn't a man's sport...retarded people in this world, i tell you
phag (2009-10-29 00:27:57)
lol! soccer is for girls.
jo (2009-10-26 18:49:37)
im a huge soccer fan and i still laughed my ass off. ur awesome.
Watface (2009-10-26 00:17:43)
Jetta, how the hell will you know if the site is up to your "standards" if you don't come back? Jesus Christ people he can't please all of you every day. Better yet, why don't you go and start your own website? The people saying that n
norske (2009-10-24 22:24:27)
Loved this one - but then, I'm not a soccer fan. This is one of your Top 10!
ur sovane (2009-10-24 02:54:05)
I have a pink pogo-stick for sale!
Gaylord tounges dick (2009-10-22 17:02:43)
Girls play baseball in Britain? Do they take steroids and have clitori that looks like dongs too? You live in a scary place, you smelly wanker.
:( (2009-10-22 11:19:05)
That was the only one I didnt like. Too direct, or maybe it works only for americans.. Big fan of the website anyway
beernwhiskey (2009-10-22 10:30:00)
leave it to that guy to make a sodimy remark at the end. Icing on the cake right there.
Dick-stand (2009-10-22 04:29:42)
This is one of your best. Awesome post. Keep it up, I know a ton of people who read this site religiously
Pain (2009-10-21 19:09:00)
Seriously funny stuff dude. Some of the funniest shit I have ever seen on the net.
Wigger McGavin (2009-10-21 15:36:44)
Holy shit. I'm laughing out loud in my office.
Pancho Villa (2009-10-21 12:48:28)
I'm sure the creator of this site realized instead of just mining craigslist for comedy gold, he could also mine idiots who don't understand or appreciate the website they're reading for even more comedy gold with this comment box. This a
anonymous (2009-10-21 02:01:29)
Moral of the story:soccer is for pink baton twirling homos named caleb who have a future full of cock in philly! <3
dsf (2009-10-20 19:52:18)
gay, too blatant. you're trying too hard
The CC (2009-10-20 19:32:03)
I am literally laughing out loud and crying. Wow. TheConstantComplainer.com
Loren (2009-10-20 15:00:22)
I think this is the funniest one! Thank you for making me laugh harder than I have in months!
Amanda (2009-10-20 12:27:46)
Hilarious, but what would you have done if his kid really was a girl? I guess it was a gamble.
Lil' Dutch (2009-10-20 12:16:57)
This site's goal is to mess with, confuse or piss people off. Seems to me it does all of that and more.if not funny 2u,follow politics.
Lolapalulz (2009-10-20 11:49:00)
He better rename the site "Emails from an unfunny asshole" or "Emails from an asshole in 3rd grade".
anonymous (2009-10-20 11:36:42)
It's called E-mails from an Asshole people...he does not have to be PC!!! If you think this is rude...well just fuck off!
Jenna (2009-10-20 11:24:19)
I agree with JettaJameson, insulting people like it's third grade all over again is just juvenile and unfunny. Do more like Horse Farm, and less like this puerile shit.
Angry (2009-10-20 10:58:24)
LoL I was laughing my ass off!! Yeah too bad you couldn't string him along a little more :(
bob (2009-10-20 10:12:46)
Just wasn't that funny...
JettaJameson (2009-10-20 09:17:57)
This site has gone so downhill. Clearly the magic and the creativity are gone. All they ever do is insult people like it's 3rd grade again. Lame. When you start doing ones like Horse Farm again, I'll be back. Until then, I'm done.
Lol (2009-10-20 06:13:16)
Dude people need to loosen up. Jokes make the world round. Don't take it so personal!
witchy (2009-10-20 03:08:49)
OMG too funny!! Hilarious!!! I loved it!! His replies were priceless LOL And to all you pansies who take this shit personally LOL Get over yourself.. It's all in fun!! If it bothers you that much then click the big X in the corner :-D
Hump (2009-10-20 02:24:33)
Insane awesomeness ! :D<3
Sarah Ann (2009-10-20 00:44:53)
I am a girl, and I like soccer, but I thought this was f*&#in hilarious!!! Keep up the good work!!!!!
AlwaysAmazed (2009-10-20 00:01:00)
People who choose to read a website titled "Emails from an Asshole," and then urge the guy to "have a heart" demonstrate a ... remarkable level of intelligence.
funny (2009-10-19 23:32:44)
i like how everyone is gettn so angry ovr these comments and no one is going to do nething bc its the internet and ne can talk big cant we just read the pranks and not get mad? if you get mad at them then why are you here reading them? accoridng to logic
John (2009-10-19 22:25:40)
LOL. Padball is a lame sport and soccer is far superior BUT this is still funny
jeremy (2009-10-19 22:11:13)
ehhh wasn't that good.
elf (2009-10-19 21:07:19)
I never get tired of soccer fans trying to defend their sport. Me thinks you protest too much
new jack (2009-10-19 20:29:51)
american padded poof ball is shit, try playing some rugby ya pansy cunts.
YurBlkDaddy (2009-10-19 20:16:43)
very,very funny.
Robert (2009-10-19 19:11:13)
This one fucking sucked!
GarthBrooks (2009-10-19 16:57:20)
Please, please, please don't stop doing this. Whenever a bad day at work arises, I click this site, read 4 or 5 and instantly cheer up man. Good work and keep pumpin em out!
jdarts84 (2009-10-19 16:52:30)
It's really hard not to laugh at a guy from England named "GAYlord" calling American football a pansy sport.
Gaylord (2009-10-19 15:21:09)
Don't be such a smartass "anonymous" don't even have the guts to use a real name!
anonymous (2009-10-19 13:37:39)
everyone offended that he is making fun of soccer is retarded. hes just trying to piss the guy off, and it worked. i bet you think he owns a glue factory, has malaria, and served in vietnam as well.
Rob (2009-10-19 13:22:01)
Usually your emails are funny, but soccer isn't a wussy sport at all. it takes serious fitness levels to be able to run for 90 minutes straight, without stoppages every 10 seconds as in football.
CaptainBanana (2009-10-19 13:21:17)
Rugby IS so gay, in France there a lot of rugby teams which are only composed of gays. This is because they enjoy to huddle together.
Gaylord (2009-10-19 12:16:58)
PS Netball (your Basketball) and Rounders (your Baseball) is only played by girls at school, check out the difference between a Girly Rounders/Baseball ball and a Manly Cricket Ball
Gaylord (2009-10-19 12:11:20)
OK as a brit, soccer (we call football) is a bit Gay, but are you saying American Football isn't gay too!, a real mans game is Rugby, probably what American football originates from but without all the Gay padding :)
BecauseICan (2009-10-19 11:33:07)
Not very funny.... and very sexist. I'm a girl and I hate soccer (all that running), growing up I would've rather played football. Not all girls play/like socceer.
cali sherpa (2009-10-19 10:56:47)
not bad...but he should have called you out on your gun/hunting choice. Who is gonna kill a deer w/ a goddamed bird gun. Amateur hour buddy, amateur hour.
Sanders (2009-10-19 10:38:10)
Why do you assume its the father... this reaction is much more typical of a woman "what a big man you are." Nowhere does it state their mother/father status.
Jeff (2009-10-19 10:16:55)
As good as always
ineedabmwx5 (2009-10-19 08:49:28)
Great, as always!
bicykel.com (2009-10-19 07:10:42)
I love it. This was certainly a good one.
C_moua (2009-10-19 06:01:43)
We need a RSS feed !!
smarter than you (2009-10-19 00:58:39)
this stuff is brillant. Responses are very clever and def inflame the person responding to the point, where even if he thinks its a joke, he has no choice but to respond
Leeta (2009-10-19 00:49:39)
Oh My God...I needed that laugh. "I'm definitely interested in kicking your fucking ass". OMG that was precious.
ErieRider (2009-10-19 00:45:18)
Classic.
lilvanilla (2009-10-18 21:07:33)
lmmfao...keep em comin...
lolz (2009-10-18 19:33:10)
another good one keep it up. love the lawlz. btw d2jsp.org ftw. the way i found this site
Gj (2009-10-18 17:35:54)
To fucking nice... Blowing in an ally xD
norske (2009-10-18 16:02:57)
Good one. Nice omeback to the "why do you have cheerleading stuff and a pink baton". My kinda umor, you sicko.
ImABlackGuy (2009-10-18 15:05:30)
I thought it was hilarious.
anonymous (2009-10-18 14:14:08)
I didn't find this one very funny.
rss (2009-10-18 13:48:16)
we need rss.
rss (2009-10-18 13:47:40)
we need rss.
Carrey (2009-10-18 13:01:21)
This one isn't so hot. The other guy wrote very short replies while you kept writing long ones. It read like a stand-up routine rather than a prank exchange.
Groon (2009-10-18 12:44:16)
One question, asshole: if you think soccer is so gay, why do you have soccer equipment, and a cheerleader set and baton? Owned!
howYOUdoin? (2009-10-18 06:33:14)
"Tell you what" always gets me
nbfvbnm (2009-10-18 02:25:57)
you shouldve replied to the last message
anonymous (2009-10-18 00:35:14)
>>>Titty McTittles yea, but soccer is for girls. You get the pun now?
leo (2009-10-18 00:17:50)
i thinks is funny
Titty McTittles (2009-10-17 20:38:58)
{anonymous} you are a fucking moron... learn to read dumbass, the dude's ad clearly states that he is looking for soccer equipment for his KID.
J- (2009-10-17 19:31:35)
Amazing! :D
007 (2009-10-17 17:36:50)
What could be more gay than rugby?
duker73 (2009-10-17 17:32:07)
Pure Genius!
rss feed (2009-10-17 16:16:58)
for those looking for an rss feed here is one until this is actually setup osweago.com/dontevenreply.php
pud (2009-10-17 15:47:37)
this site needs an RSS feed
Pff (2009-10-17 15:39:51)
Soccer and football are for gays. Try rugby.
anonymous (2009-10-17 14:54:23)
How could he have known that the soccer player would be the guy's son, not his father?
France Sucks (2009-10-17 14:20:09)
I'm pretty sure that real men don't exist in France.
captain bananna (2009-10-17 13:48:56)
In Germany we consider french men to be women no matter what the sport they play.
CaptainBanana (2009-10-17 13:19:58)
I live in France so I found weird that soocer is considered in USA like a girl's sport because in France it's the opposite, soccer is for real men.
anonymous (2009-10-17 12:12:23)
U are a cockwaffle.
Beau Nuss (2009-10-17 11:35:10)
Soccer is a pussy sport. That said, I played soccer for 6 years. Luckily, I quit the team before I turned into a cumguzzling nancyboy.
Delco (2009-10-17 11:09:55)
"Mike", I see you're from the philly 'burbs somewhere. Hit me up on the R3!
Julia (2009-10-17 10:15:52)
Funny as shit!!! hahaha
stillafanbut... (2009-10-17 08:56:03)
OK, pretty funny but you went too far with the last line. No Dad wants to imagine his young son doing a guy in an alley. Have a heart, dude.
Sn00gan007 (2009-10-17 08:14:40)
Simply amazing! Keep up the quality work!
david pershica (2009-10-17 07:58:53)
very good. love it. need more regular updates on here. brilliant stuff.
RMR (2009-10-17 07:19:36)
"To answer your question, I have the baton and cheerleader set as trophies". Nice turnaround. Classic shit, as usual.
@fagsaregay (2009-10-17 06:04:39)
For your informathion, I am not afraid of girlth. I usthed to play tea partieth with them all the time. But ithn't it true that thome of them have teeth inthide their private parths? I jutht thtay away from down there. Way too thcary, hon.
HateCrime (2009-10-17 05:56:04)
As a homosexual who hunts NFL players with a shotgun, I am triply offended and demand immediate removal of this irresponsible posting.
meh (2009-10-17 04:58:58)
This one tried too hard... The guy wasn't even really responding.
GAZ-69 (2009-10-17 04:05:46)
Ha ha ha, this is hilarious! American football is so totally gay! With a sport where young muscular men chase each other around on a field, trying to hug each other's sweaty bodies and wrestle'm down on the ground, who needs Brokeback Mountain?
anonymous (2009-10-17 01:34:34)
#2 behind brokeback beach for me! fucking brilliant!!!
anonymous (2009-10-17 00:59:58)
Dude, you obviously live around Philly. Let me buy you a beer.
tbreezyfbaby (2009-10-17 00:57:24)
wow this guy is freakin amazing i look forward to every email keep em comin
SleazBall (2009-10-16 23:56:46)
Fucking Classic
anonymous (2009-10-16 22:36:28)
*who would watch that movie with their son?
Chan Chan (2009-10-16 22:36:02)
"So do you want the stuff or not? I also have Brokeback Mountain on DVD. I ordered Die Hard, but that was sent to me in error. It sounds like a movie that you and your son would enjoy watching." - HARSH but too damn funny to pass. Who would watch
word (2009-10-16 22:02:18)
and they get to rest for long periods of time. : )
word (2009-10-16 22:01:18)
nice.. : ) Im a basketball fanatic, but i played some soccer in college and i gotta say its probably the toughest sport out there aside from fighting sports, A. Football? Yes, they bang bodies and stuff BUT they got protective equipment and they get t
Out-Fucking-Standing (2009-10-16 21:06:56)
ROFL, funniest one in a while.
anonymous (2009-10-16 20:38:10)
well done, as always
Hmmm (2009-10-16 20:23:41)
Probably your worst one yet. You need a new angle.
KY (2009-10-16 19:25:14)
Hehe, love bashing male soccer. OW! my face omg my FACE!!!........I...I think I tripped you? Oh your up, and running again? I thought your face was gone?
fagsaregay (2009-10-16 18:43:48)
Shut up pinkagenda. And quit being terrified of girls.
fagsaregay (2009-10-16 18:43:35)
Shut up pinkagenda. And quit being terrified of girls.
Michael Jackson (2009-10-16 17:59:06)
That's ignorant!
andromeda (2009-10-16 17:48:11)
You shouldn't push their buttons too far too soon, I love it when the ridiculousness of your e-mails gradually builds up, there's more to read! :D
LMFAO (2009-10-16 17:36:18)
@ Jesus Christ!! ftw!
anonymous (2009-10-16 17:04:26)
Then, after you are done manning up, you can come back and I'll sell you some football equipment for your son. I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day. FUCKING AWESOME!!!
dawg (2009-10-16 16:33:36)
soccer own football anyways it was fun
laX4life (2009-10-16 16:28:02)
soccer is awesome, but this is just too damn funny! haha
Hurr Durr (2009-10-16 16:01:04)
4chan.org lolz
wise man (2009-10-16 15:59:55)
obviously he would have the soccer equipment because his daughter played soccer, which is why he figured another soccer player was a female, damn conspiracy theorists just enjoy a good thing while you have it!
Xisco (2009-10-16 15:32:14)
Soccer er I mean football isn't gay at all, jeesz...
knubbe (2009-10-16 15:17:03)
awesome stuff!!
trilauhal (2009-10-16 14:57:04)
delicious
AB (2009-10-16 14:34:37)
"Well, I'm definitely interested in kicking your fucking ass" - LOLOL on that response
better than decent (2009-10-16 14:34:11)
haha, i have to commend the dad for coming up with a semi-intelligent rebuttal. But the battle def goes to the site creator as his retort reached his intended purpose of enraging the dad to the point most people on this site go to of telling him to FUCK
Mad (2009-10-16 14:27:40)
That one was amazing.
Chuck (2009-10-16 14:27:31)
I think this one actually for the first time goes to the dad. with his "One question, asshole: if you think soccer is so gay, why do you have soccer equipment, and a cheerleader set and baton?"
Backalley BJ (2009-10-16 14:05:39)
WE WANT MORE! WE WANT MORE!
Twister (2009-10-16 13:46:41)
love this website this is definitely another classic. Funny ass stuff.
fake (2009-10-16 13:27:23)
no-one hunts deer with a 10ga... that a goose gun
JP (2009-10-16 12:53:32)
Amazing!
House (2009-10-16 12:39:50)
Awesome. Great work, keep it up! Is it always sunny there? Full-on Rapist...
I thought... (2009-10-16 12:34:39)
he was gunna say buy my shotgun and shoot your kid lol
Dunkan (2009-10-16 12:33:57)
Wow this father got pretty pissed!!
SoccerIsForTheGays (2009-10-16 12:31:14)
They just keep getting better, but we need more updates! Comeon! Get more advertisers and start doing daily updates, there are plenty of idiots on Craigslist to troll!
zz (2009-10-16 12:23:08)
although I'm a big football(you guys call it soccer for some reason)fan it's hilarious!! keep up the good work!
Jesus Christ (2009-10-16 12:18:33)
"Then, after you are done manning up...." Jesus Christ loves this shit!
janelmpls (2009-10-16 12:11:59)
LMAO Love this!
atj (2009-10-16 12:10:14)
i also love soccer and play it well. hey caleb interested in meeting up, i wanna "give" you something special from my mouth. hope you;re black caleb casue i like them big and thick.
Athena (2009-10-16 12:09:30)
"Your son could probably just use his bunny slippers." - THIS IS PRICELESS! xD
atj (2009-10-16 12:08:37)
"I'd hate to see him blowing Caleb in an alley in Philly some day." too funny
Caleb (2009-10-16 12:07:11)
Hey I want my Baton back!!
jms (2009-10-16 12:06:03)
ROFL @ the cheerleading set!! BAHAHAHAHAHAH
mhmm. (2009-10-16 12:04:24)
good stuff.. "my mistake.." that line gets me everytime!!!! = ]
R-OH (2009-10-16 12:00:08)
"I saw him in Philly a few weeks ago blowing some guy in an alley." Hilarious.
Dejan Ivanov (2009-10-16 11:45:04)
Nice !!!
PinkAgenda (2009-10-16 11:43:16)
I write in protest of the stereotypical misconceptions in this exchange. As a gay man, I have always been equally terrified of football AND soccer.
Idontusuallycomment (2009-10-16 11:32:37)
haha, pretty good
rckrdude (2009-10-16 11:29:15)
First comment =P Absolutely hilarious LOL. Would've liked longer replies from him though.

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